In a week, I’ll head back to my loveable ENT for what just might be a life changing procedure. As I mentioned in my last post, the entire right side of my head has been so inundated with fungal infection over the years that my frontal sinus never formed properly and everything is majorly swollen and inflamed from top to bottom. Over the last few months, I’ve been on two rounds of hefty antibiotics and antifungals to get the inflammation down as much as possible, which still doesn’t allow for much air flow on that side. But come Tuesday, my dear, talkative, excitable doctor will perform a balloon sinuplasty which will solve so many issues that have plagued me for decades.
I’ll be on some good pain and nausea meds so my mom will be here to shuttle me to and fro and make sure I don’t bend over or lift anything for a few days. I’ve been told he’ll spend nearly an hour just on the numbing portion of the procedure. I’ll be awake but, thankfully, he promises I’ll feel nothing. He’ll use the kind of decongestant only professionals have access to and shrink my inflamed tissue down to nothing. I can. not. wait. to take a big inhale with wide open nostrils. I honestly don’t remember a time, even going back to childhood, when there wasn’t some degree of stuffiness in my head. Then, he’ll head up my nose to each sinus – the frontal, the sphenoid, and the maxillary, insert a device, and inflate a balloon, pushing back inflamed tissues and removing infection. He’ll send me home loopy and with things flowing out of my nose that have been in my head for a very long time. I’ll go back a couple days later to have any dead tissue removed and he’ll put an antifungal treatment directly into my sinuses. All the ones I’ve been using haven’t been able to get deep in there so this will be the final step in killing it all. <commence evil laugh>
The results? First, an unobstructed airway. Does this mean I might start actually liking exercise if I can breathe during it?? Second, getting rid of the fungal infections for good! This is month three of treating them (not including the initial antifungal treatments in February and March). I’m so over it! I can’t even look at a mushroom without getting a little angry right now. Third, my fatigue will start to improve. My body is fighting all of that stuck infection every day. Once we can eliminate it, it’ll give my immune system a much needed break and should give me more energy and require less recovery time after exertion. And forth, maybe, just maybe, the main cause of my migraines will be eliminated. I hesitate to get too excited about this one because it seems too good to be true. But, just getting those inflamed turbinates out of the way should make a huge difference for me. I’ll wait to believe this one until I feel it, but if I can go a whole month (or even weeks at this point) without a migraine, you bet you’ll be hearing me shout for joy from the rooftops! Initial recovery should just be a couple days but things will continue to improve over the course of a few weeks.
My sister likes to joke that I’m going in for a nose job, but there’s good news on the real job front too! I’m excited to announce that I’ll be joining the team at moss+ross. moss+ross is a consulting firm that works with nonprofits on fundraising and capital campaigns, strategic planning, staffing, and executive searches. I’m so excited to get started and especially to work with a life long friend, Brooke Jenkins. What a gift to have a professional best friend and professional consultant as a guide in this new role! I’ll start part time at first while I still continue with mold treatments. And I’ll get to work from home for the majority of the time which will allow me the flexibility to continue to heal. I’m excited to use what I’ve learned in 20 years of ministry to help other nonprofits succeed. It feels like the right next step in my career and I’m eager to get started. Reversing the flow of my bank account will be so welcome too! Being sick is one of the most bankrupting things a person can go through…and I was one of the lucky ones! So many don’t have the means to take time to rest and heal, much less finance the mind boggling expensive treatments. This new role is coming just in time and I can’t be more grateful for it and for my time away to make my health top priority.
You might be tempted to think that these last nine + months have been one long Sabbath. And, of course, some aspects of this time have been Sabbath-like. But it’s also been a lot of work…non-stop work. While I wasn’t working at my vocation during this time, I was working on healing 24/7. There’s no day off from that. There’s no day when you can just not think about it. There’s not even more than two waking hours between my medicine alarms. For over nine months, I haven’t gone more than two hours without being reminded that my body isn’t functioning properly. Even when I’ve been able to enjoy trips to the beach or fun times with friends and family, I’ve had to plan for that energy expenditure and feel guilty that I might be missing an entire treatment day (and yes, it was always worth it). But, that constant vigilance will be a big part of my life for the foreseeable future. My health and healing is not something I’ll take time away from anytime soon. So, accepting my reality, I’m ready to get back to work. It’s one area in which I can relish the pause. It’s something that will help identify the lines between when I’m resting and when I’m not. And it’s a way for me to shift my focus outward. I’ve never been so inwardly focused in my life as I’ve been these last nine months. For good reason, no doubt. My life depended on it. But, I’m getting kinda tired of myself and I’m ready to put myself into something besides…well, me. So I’m looking forward to having worthwhile projects capture my attention between those drug reminders. With any success at balance, I’ll get back to seeking out moments of true Sabbath along the way.
How can you help?
- There are still lots of products I need on an ongoing basis that can be gifted. Check out the amazon wish list here.
- I welcome your prayers, good vibes, and warm thoughts on Tuesday, 10/24 as have the Balloon Sinuplasty procedure.
- Send me your best work from home tips. Share your wisdom as I start this new endeavor.
Seeking Sabbath 